Invisible Touch

Invisible Touch

Chapter 10 ~ Friendship

By junior year, Ernie and Kim had become very close friends. It was a bit awkward, the way he kept his distance all the time. He was like this with everybody, she noticed. Some kind of problem or issue he must have with people -- he didn't ever talk about it, whatever it was. It didn't affect their friendship, though. He was a great person to talk to and be around. He was an excellent listener, very caring. So what if he was a bit quirky. Who wasn't?

Ernie did avoid physical contact with everybody. He went to great lengths to avoid his dreams and visions. He would use taxis instead of taking the bus. He would always phone ahead with even a simple sandwich order rather than standing in line at a sub shop. He avoided crowds wherever he went.

But this solved only half of his problem. Ernie would still have dreams about strangers -- the foggy waves of color and blurred images could be triggered by hearing a voice -- even on the radio, reading a story in the newspaper, visiting a site on the Internet. But not always, he noticed. They were still a mystery, these hazy colorful dreams.

And they didn't affect him in quite the same way. He couldn't ignore them, but he could usually see through them. Visually, they created waves of color, but if he concentrated hard enough, he could still see whatever was in front of him. It was lucky, he thought, that these visions were manageable. He couldn't imagine having to shut the world out completely.

It wasn't difficult for a business major and pre-law student to take classes together; he and Kim did so whenever they could. This semester it was business law. One evening the two classmates were preparing for an upcoming exam.

"Are you feeling all right?" Kim asked.

"Fine," he said. Waves of pink clouded his vision, but he could focus on Kim and what she was saying.

"Oh, OK," she said. "You just seemed a little out of it there for a minute."

"Just a little tired, I guess," he lied. "You're sweet, though. Thanks for asking."

"Sure," she said. "We can take a break if you'd like. And just talk."

"I'd like that," he said, and put down the notebook he'd been studying from. His vision was clear now, but he would enjoy a few minutes off.

He stood up and stretched before he sat back down. That did feel good, he thought, even if he was just doing it for effect.

"I'm a little jealous, you know," he said to her out of the blue.

"Huh?" she gave him a puzzled look.

"Law school. I'd like to go some day, but..."

"I know, and you really should. You'd be so good at that," she told him.

"Maybe in a few years. Who knows. Did you always want be a lawyer?" he asked.

"Oh no," she said seriously. "I really wanted to be a ballerina."

He couldn't help but laugh.

"Stop it," she said. "I'm serious! Well, until I was five, I wanted to be a ballerina. And then I wanted to be a figure skater. Just like Oksana Baiul or Ekaterina Gordeeva. I was glued to those Olympics -- when was it, I think they were in Norway.

"I remember that," Ernie said. "So were you ever a skater?"

"Oh no," she replied. But we'd go out in the driveway and dance around like we were on skates. Oh yeah, we were just skating crazy!"

"That was you?" Ernie joked. "We used to drive by and say, 'who are those crazy girls skating around in that driveway?'"

"Ha ha ha," she said. "And I suppose you never wanted to be..." she couldn't decide on a name.

"Oh sure, I was going to be the next Paul Molitor," he confessed. "While you were dancing around the driveway, I was swinging a sawed-off broom handle. And sad to say, I never made it to the Hall Of Fame. No tennis ball was safe around me, though. Or garage door window."

"I met Robin Yount once," Kim told him.

Ernie's eyes lit up.

"Oh yeah?" he said.

"About a week before he was inducted into the Hall of Fame, if I remember correctly. My family was in Chicago for my tenth birthday present. He was walking down Michigan Avenue just like anybody else. My dad recognized him and I have to say, it was pretty embarrassing the way Dad walked up and introduced himself. He and my dad chatted for a minute and he wished me a 'happy birthday' and then continued on his way. A real nice guy. I never forgot that.

"I guess not -- that's pretty neat!" Ernie said.

Ernie and Kim were serious students, and it showed. Both had grade point averages in the high threes. It didn't hurt that they each had just enough of a competitive streak that a bad grade would be too embarrassing to allow.

Kim had already begun taking her LSAT, and had done well enough that she was not going to take it again -- she was already receiving lots of fan mail from law schools all over the country. Trouble was, she hated the idea of leaving town.

It wasn't just Ernie, she told herself. She'd grown up here, and now she was a grownup in this city that she loved. She was comfortable here. Yes, she knew that was no reason to limit herself. In fact, a part of her felt that this was just the reason she should pick a school somewhere else. Then if she did decide to come back home after law school, she'd know she had explored other options.

She wondered what Ernie would do.

"Wow, that's a tough decision," he told her. I'm sure glad I'm not in your shoes!"

He was just teasing, she knew.

"On the one hand, two of the top schools in the country are right in your own back yard."

She knew he was talking about Chicago. "That's a big back yard," she told him. That's two hours away!"

"There are excellent schools out west, on the east coast -- all over. Sure, there are law schools nearby, but this you've seen. Don't you think it's time you expanded your horizons?"

She knew he was playing devil's advocate, at least she thought he was.

"Wouldn't you be lonely so far from home? What about friends and family?" she asked.

"Yeah, that's something to think about, I guess," he conceded. "But they'll be here when you get back."

"They?" she said with a smile.

"We will," he added. "We all will. You know me, I'm not going anywhere."

"Oh you're going places all right," she told him.

That remark made him laugh.

"I really am glad I'm not in your shoes," he said again. It would be so easy to stay here in town or even within a couple hours drive away. But is that what's really right for you? You have to think about what kind of law you want to practice, what kind of firm you want to work for. And where you want to practice, sure. Do you have to go to the best school that will accept you, no matter how far away it is? Not really. But if you can get into a really top school -- and I have no doubt in my mind that you can -- you owe it to yourself to think about every option."

"Is that what you really think or are you just telling me what I need to hear?" she asked.

"A little of both," he confessed. "I would miss you if you went away. Honestly, I'd miss you a lot. A big lot. A huge lot!"

She smiled when he said that.

"But even if this is where you want to spend the rest of your life," he told her, "it should be because you made a decision, not because you didn't make one."

Wow, she thought. He certainly had a point.

By senior year, Kim and Ernie were completely inseparable. They were bowling one night, as they often did. Ernie wasn't much of a bowler -- he had only been bowling a few years. So when he would bowl a strike, he would get pretty excited about it. Two strikes in a row, that had happened once before tonight.

It was his turn again and he picked up his ball. "Watch this, I'm going to do it again," he told her.

He wasn't even trying, and maybe that's why he was so relaxed. He pulled that ball back and rolled it down the lane. It looked perfect. It even sounded perfect. There was a crunching sound as every pin fell down.

"Wow," Ernie said. He couldn't think of anything else to say.

Kim was squealing with excitement for him as he came back to sit down. She stood up and offered him a high five. He raised his hand and thought for a split second before he pulled his hand back.

"No high five," she said. He could tell she was hurt and confused.

"Can we talk about it later?" he asked.

"Could we please?" she replied.

Ernie sat down as Kim went to take her turn. He bent over, head in his hands, and began crying. Kim was waiting for her ball to come back when she noticed what was happening.

"Ernie, what is it?" she asked. She wanted to put her arm around him and console him, but she knew there was some reason why she couldn't. "Do you want to get out of here?" she asked.

He nodded, and she gathered up their equipment.

She drove to his apartment and they both sat down in the living room.

"I don't even know where to start," he began.

"Just help me understand what's wrong," she said. "I love you, Ernie. You're my best friend and I love you and I just want to help."

"You won't believe it," he said.

"Try me. Please, just tell me," she begged.

"What would you say if I told you..." he started.

He wasn't sure he was doing the right thing. But she was his friend. She was his best friend and she wanted to help.

"...If I told you I could see into the future," he said.

"OK, you were right. That's pretty unbelievable. But go on," she offered.

"Ever since I was a kid, this has happened to me. It wasn't as bad back then, and it didn't happen all the time. But now it does."

"What happens?"

"I get these dreams. As a kid they were only at night, but now they happen just any time, day or night."

Kim had a puzzled look on her face, but she was willing to listen.

"Do you remember when Central High won the state championship in football?" Ernie asked.

"Sure, we... we must have been in eighth grade that year," Kim answered.

"Right. I knew it was going to happen nine days before it did."

"Lots of people thought Central would win. They had a great team that year, and..." Kim said.

"No, I mean I saw it. I saw the white hat he was wearing after the game. I saw the trophy. I mean I saw it, really saw it, in a dream."

"And this happened because... why?"

"Because Bobby Newman gave me a high five at practice."

"What??" Kim's head was spinning at this point. "I don't understand."

"Someone touches me, any kind of physical contact, and I have a dream about them. I can see if they're happy or sad or sick..." He paused, a bit choked up. "I saw my next door neighbor lying on the floor, reaching for her pills, the day before it happened."

"I don't know what to say," Kim said.

"I know it sounds crazy," Ernie offered.

"Yeah, it sounds crazy," she agreed. "It sounds totally bat poop insane, crazy. I've never heard anything so completely off the wall nuts. But why would you make something like this up? Why would you act the way you do sometimes? Not letting anybody touch you. I guess that now it all makes sense."

"It's just that..."

"Look, Ernie. I want to believe you. I really, truly do. So why can't a person touch you, again? Why is that so bad? Why won't you let me touch you? I missed that part of the story." She was frustrated now. Even if this were true, which she could barely wrap her head around, let alone believe, it didn't completely explain why he acted the way he did.

"Your future..." he began. "It's yours. It's private. It's none of my business."

"But you... So you... You won't touch anyone because you don't want to see their future?" she asked.

"That's right, but it's more than just that. I can't predict when the dreams will come. They blur my vision and I end up in some kind of daze. That's why I can't drive a car. I can't even ride a bike."

"I see," she said. "What if I told you I didn't mind if you saw my future? Would that make a difference?"

"Honestly, I wouldn't want to make a habit of it," Ernie said. "I just don't feel right about it."

"Come here," she said, and stood up.

Ernie rose from the couch. They stood facing each other for a minute or so. It seemed like an eternity to both of them, neither knowing what would happen or what should happen.

"It's OK, Ernie," she told him.

And she wrapped her arms around him. He felt a jolt of a shock, and then it passed. The damage was done, he knew, so he hugged her back. They held each other tight and both of them were in tears.

"I love you, too," he told her softly.

And their embrace continued.

"I have to go," she finally said. "I've got a Psychology exam in the morning."

"OK," he said. He felt emotionally drained. "I'll talk to you tomorrow."

His eyes began to blur just as she was closing his apartment door behind her. He sat back down on the couch and waited.

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